A Woman's Perspective: Crying Isn't OK, Even If You're Robert Pattinson

In a recent interview about his upcoming movie "Water for Elephants," the translucent-skinned vampire Robert Pattinson admitted the unthinkable--crying during a sex scene with Reese Witherspoon. The tears weren't of shame, but of happiness, he said. "I'm totally OK with crying at her beauty."

He shouldn't be. Even though we girls claim to want a guy with a fully functioning sensitivity chip, the truth is, we'd much rather have a Rambo than a Romeo. Forget the lyrical gushings of Bruno Mars--we don't care if you'll catch a grenade for us or take a bullet to the brain; we'd rather have a guy who can change a flat tire or fix a blown fuse. To us, a good man is the equivalent of a personal handyman who's on-call 24/7.

Of course, those services won't go unrewarded, which is why we repay you (in the bedroom and kitchen). If you and your friends are watching football at home, then we'll gladly play the role of hostess and provide an endless supply of beer and snacks. All we ask in return is that you carry some shopping bags every now and then. And please, don't try to provide fashion advice. If we ask you how we look in something, we're just looking for a compliment, not your actual opinion.

So take note, Robert Pattinson; an ideal caveman should never use baby talk, engage in excessive PDA or, God forbid, cry. And if he has to, it better be because of sports.

Posted in: Info Showbiz